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2024 Sanity Test

Are you Sure You're Not Nutz?

Really, you're taking a test to see if you're not insane, so what does that imply?

Here's how this test works. You don't have to answer every question. You don't have to answer any questions. You don't have to take the test. There are actual, correct answers (to some questions). You're probably sane if you laugh at a few of the answers, unless you were paid to laugh. Getting the correct answers is not the ultimate goal. You probably should be doing something more productive, but we'll let it slide, this time.

Cheating is allowed and actually encouraged.

Answer as honestly as possible. And that goes for you, too, Mr. Senator.

If you don't like the result, take the quiz over again after you've written the correct answers on a plain sheet of yellow paper, put it into an envelope with a check for $54,000 made out to IdleGuy.com. You can mail it to us at the address found on the back of this page. Go ahead, look on the back of your computer or phone. Our address is there. It's not? You looked? HAHAHAHA.

This is humor/satire. Treat it as such.


1. Transgendism is _______?
  • Something you want to do when you grow up.
  • Something you have already done.
  • Something you don't want your kids doing.
  • OK, as long as the people doing it stay in their lane and make sure not to go swimming for at least 30 minutes afterward.
  • Something you'd like your wife to try.
  • While I've heard of this, I'm not sure what it really is, though I am not comfotable with people doing weird things with their bodies, unles, of course, they get paid lots of money.

2. As far as "MAN of the Year" is concerned, who would you choose for 2023? Please pay attention to words in BOLD CAPS.

  • Donald Trump
  • Vladimir Putin
  • Elon Musk
  • My dead mother-in-law who used to kick my kids and took food and money from beggars, blind people and drug addicts.
  • All of these

3. What?

  • This
  • That
  • Those guys over there smmoking cigars and looking seedy.
  • Joey Buttafuoco
  • THOU
  • Whom

0. Who put the bomp in the bomp bah bomp bah bomp?

  • Bomp bah bah bomp, Bah bomp bah bomp bah bomp bomp.
  • Lorem Ipsum, in conjunction with Dolor Sit Amet
  • Choo-Choo Charlie
  • The same guy who put the ram in the rama lama ding dong
  • Is this a trick question?
  • Putin

5. What does this picture represent to you?

  • Man's inhumanity to man.
  • Dog's inhumanity to cats.
  • My inhumanity to myself, after a long night out at strip clubs.
  • Just inhumanity, man. It's so BASED.
  • The American Dance Troupe on LSD
  • Once again, my dead mother-in-law, that evil woman. You cannot fathom just how deeply loathsome a person she was. My wife, bless her soul, turned out to be a somewhat better person than her mother, but that woman killed her own husband, and ate him! I mean, how sick is that?

6K. January 6, 2021 was what?

  • An insurrection
  • An FBI-CIA planned event, sanctioned by then-Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, all intended to set up Donald Trump to be charged with insurrection so he couldn't run for president again.
  • 100% Donald Trump's fault
  • Not quite as bad as Pearl Harbor or 9/11 but damn close.
  • This is not an answer.
  • Putin did it.

7. Who is the smartest woman in the world?

  • Hillary Clinton
  • Lindsay Graham
  • Senator Elizabeth Warren, even though she's not 1/100,000,0000,000th Cherokee Indian, er, Native American
  • Nikki Haley
  • Marilyn vos Savant
  • There's no such thing.

24. How tall are you?

  • How tall would you like me to be?
  • What are you wearing?
  • 5' 11", but I'm mush taller measured in centimeters.
  • Standing up or on my back?
  • Tall enough, wise guy.
  • This is another trick question, isn't it?

3.. If you had complete control of the world's most efficient and realistic Artificial Intelligence and $3 trillion dollars, what would you do with it?

  • Buy Harvard, Yale, and Princeton Universities and burn them to the ground because I want to Brown and was always mocked.
  • World Peace, man. It's so based.
  • Make everyone in the world who uses the word "based" and thinks it's cool, speak broken Hungarian for the rest of their lives.
  • Buy China? Is that reasonable?
  • Make sure NOBODY ever publishes stupid tests like this one ever again.
  • Bring that whiner's mother-in-law back to life and make 50,000 clones of her. Hahahahaha.

10. Finally, if you get this last question right, you win.

  1. 16
  2. That's what she said.
  3. C'mon, man, that's not fair to the little people.
  4. This question is so based.
  5. The circumference of the universe.
  6. Deputy Dawg and Mighty Mouse playing hockey.

Score =

Correct answers:


Do Not Look Over Here

1. Standing up or on my back?

7. That's not important.

23. The American Dance Troupe on LSD.

2. Something you'd like your wife to try.

3. Elon Musk

0. That's not important.

5. Nikki Halie.

6K. Putin or Trump, 100%

3. That is so based, dude.

0. That's not important.

Hah! You believed us when we said cheating was encouraged. You looked at what you thought were the correct answers, but we fooled you by changing all of them using invisible ink and rearranging them. Best of all, they're all wrong. You lose. LOLOLOLOL.

The actual correct answers are on page 38 of the Bhagavad Gita.

OK, no, here's the breakdown: If you scored 0, you're probably sane because it means you didn't take this test seriously. If you scored less than zero, you're either a hacker or Mark Zuckerberg, or, oh, they're the same thing.

Scores between 10 and 30% mean almost nothing. Nobody is going to care if you got 1, 2, or 3 of these questions right. You're probably sane, but also probably an idiot and quite insecure.

If you scored exactly 40%, you're a narcissistic masochist with a passive-aggressive disorder. We checked, and we're sure about this.

If you scored exactly 46, 73 or 165, you're a damn liar or you found a way to cheat that we haven't figured out yet, but we will, and we're gonna getcha.

Gloria Estefan. I mean, why not?

If you socred 50, probably sane, but, there are no guarantees. You are aware that your every movement is being tracked by aliens, right?

We din't uze speel chex on this so nevr mnid.

A score of 60 indicates that you're very lucky because only a few of these answers make any sense. Your room at the asylum is reserved.

If you scored 70%, you're borderline genius and your mother is probably proud that you became a gynecologist.

Scores of 80 or 90% indicate you need to get back on your meds.

If you scored 100%, proceed to the redemption booth and pick up your pony. You're completely ku-koo, bananas, off-your-rocker, NUTZ, in all BOLD CAPS. Admit it, you did pay extra attention to the words in BOLD CAPS..
Good luck in 2024. You're going to need it.

About some of the individual answers:

Marilyn vos Savant can actually lay claim to being the smartest woman in the world. After all she was listed in the Guiness Book of World Records as having the highest recorded IQ score in the world. However, if you ansered Lindsay Graham, you're perfectly sane.

Saying evrything is "based" is very GenZ, so, if you're over the age of 30, don't do it.

Question 3. What? Huh? You're questioning that?

When in doubt and especially if you don't live out in the sticks and registered Democrat, Putin did it or it's 100% Trump's fault usually works.

BTW: Vladimir Putin is IdleGuy.com's Man of the Year. No foolin'.

J6, worth another look.

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