In case you're wondering, the Toast of the Town are expressions heard in person or around the web, often anonymous. Idleguy.com collects them and posts them on IdleGuy Daily, aka, the Daily Idler. These are the best from the past month.

Sometimes I look at Biden and wonder, "How do they fit all that stupid into one head?"

They're not nice people. They're lawyers.

Don't bet on the one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest.

The EU leadership has to be the first recorded example of rats determined to stay on a sinking ship.

I want to sit in the dark and think about nothing.

Maybe he needs a nice, warm glass of shut the hell up.

We want your money back.

Banksters must be feeling their sphincters loosening.

I should be able to produce a higher intelligence than the feds by putting all my hammers in a box.

The V.A. is giving veterans a second chance to die for their country.

I would like to see Murray Rothbard as Speaker of the House. I know he's been dead for some time, but, considering the alternatives, is that really a drawback?

I defy anyone to eat 40 pounds of potatoes in a month.

Kevin McCarthy is a feature of the swamp. He has risen to power by collecting special interest money and redistributing that money in exchange for favors. - Congressman Matt Gaetz, October 3, 2023

If printing money would end poverty, then printing diplomas would end stupidity. - Javier Milei

Somebody put a little too much chlorine in that gene pool.

Pickleball is tennis for fat-assed people who can't run.

IDF stands for Imminent Demolition Forthcoming.

The United States is well past full retard. It's in the drooling imbecile phase now.

"Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do." - Pele

The good thing about the internet is that everyone has a voice. The bad thing about the internet is that everyone has a voice.

Seriously, I make awesome ice cubes.

I'm going to be working until after I die.

I developed a way of using hundreds of carefully selected positions
on the short side, dubbed "the cream of the crap." - David Rogers Webb

Order more holy water and then drown yourself in it.

Stop wearing lifts in public, kid. You look like a retard.

For Bud Light, the problem they face is trying to not be identified as gay beer.

One of your cows was grazing in my garden.

There are now no property rights to securities held in book-entry form
in any jurisdiction, globally. - David Rogers Webb

That guy whose knuckles are dragging on the floor can dunk standing still from the foul line. Pick him first.

I called to ask my wife what was for dinner. She said, "shit," so I told her she could have mine and I'd pick something up on the way home.

As part of NATO concessions, Russia should win the Eurovision Song Contest for the next 15 years.

Bitcoin was also clubbed like a baby seal, round-tripping yesterday's gains, plunging from $28,000 to $35,5000 where it found support. - ZeroHedge, 11/16/23

I figured I'd pick up donuts on the way in, kind of a treat for the staff. Didn't know I'd need to take out a mortgage for a dozen glazed.