In case you're wondering, the Toast of the Town are anonymous expressions heard in person or around the web. Idleguy.com collects them and posts them on IdleGuy Daily, aka, the Daily Idler. These are the best from the past month.

You have the right to remain silent or speak and prove that you're guilty. They got ya, either way.

It is far, far better and much safer to have a firm anchor in nonsense than to put out on the troubled seas of thought.
-- John Kenneth Galbraith (1958)

I really don't care for the taste of radioactive salmon.

Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.
-- Mark Twain, The Tragedy of Pudd'nhead Wilson (1894)

Just guessing, but wouldn't the Bill Clinton Presidential Library contain a lot of porn?

"Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities."
-- Voltaire

In the end they're outnumbered. If the question is whether to die fighting as a free man or live as a slave, there comes a reckoning either way.

I don't think you can say "giant dildos" on TV.

The next phase of human evolution can't begin until our species abandons the concept that any group of people has a right to dictate to another.

Fear is simply the language and motivation of the Devil.

Why is there a picture of a transvestite at the top of this post?

The Yankees would have made the playoffs if they didn't lose so many games.

He said he loved me. That's when I first started thinking about dumping him.

There was a time when justice was swift and honest. Today it is tedious and fraught with obsolete conventions.

She gave her back her tablet and then she caught her sexting.

He could save two hours of driving by not going.

If you really want to see the future of AI, just take a close look at the US congress.

In a debt-based economy, we'e all living on borrowed time.

No lie. If you do a search for "Bunga Bunga," Silvio Berlusconi's picture comes up. The guy knew how to live.

How long have bond yields been inverted? Shia LaBeouf still had an acting career the last time the yield curve was upward-sloping.

I know a local handyman who charges $60 an hour to do stuff you or I could do, like move furniture, fix broken windows, trim bushes, some painting, and he can't keep up with the work.

How exactly do you sprain your ankle while having sex?

Covid, Ukraine, open borders, corruption, lies, propaganda. Why TF should I play by the rules if our supreme overlords aren't going to?

How did she get so far in life without the use of knee-pads?

Government is very good at destroying just about anything. Put some bureaucrats in charge and they'll wreck anything that works in record time.

"When the people find they can vote themselves money, that will herald the end of the republic." - - Ben Franklin

I plan on dressing in a manner that expresses an uncompromising disrespect for them and their institution.

Baudrillard is good when you can't get LSD.